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Monday, January 2nd, 2012
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Saturday, December 5th, 2009
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youre reading society of the spectacle on a kindle
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Thursday, December 3rd, 2009
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what happens when you send a suicide threat to the irs?
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wendy rene's voice is all that there is
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I learned the truth at seventeen
That love was meant for beauty queens
And high school girls with clear skinned smiles
Who married young and then retired
The valentines I never knew
The Friday night charades of youth
Were spent on one more beautiful
At seventeen I learned the truth...
And those of us with ravaged faces
Lacking in the social graces
Desperately remained at home
Inventing lovers on the phone
Who called to say "come dance with me"
And murmured vague obscenities
It isn't all it seems at seventeen...
A brown eyed girl in hand me downs
Whose name I never could pronounce
Said: "Pity please the ones who serve
They only get what they deserve"
The rich relationed hometown queen
Marries into what she needs
With a guarantee of company
And haven for the elderly...
So remember those who win the game
Lose the love they sought to gain
In debentures of quality and dubious integrity
Their small-town eyes will gape at you
In dull surprise when payment due
Exceeds accounts received at seventeen...
To those of us who knew the pain
Of valentines that never came
And those whose names were never called
When choosing sides for basketball
It was long ago and far away
the world was younger than today
when dreams were all they gave for free
to ugly duckling girls like me...
We all play the game, and when we dare
We cheat ourselves at solitaire
Inventing lovers on the phone
Repenting other lives unknown
That call and say: "Come on, dance with me"
And murmur vague obscenities
At ugly girls like me, at seventeen...
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the slice of indigo from behind the curtain, the falling moon through the slats in the blinds
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handz (12:19:59 AM): oh shit
handz (12:20:16 AM): all shibbed out
handz (12:20:28 AM): n shib
handz (12:20:54 AM): youve gotta be shibbin me
shibdaha signed off at 12:21:23 AM.
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Wednesday, December 2nd, 2009
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Give me time
To realise my crime
Let me love and steal
I have danced inside your eyes
How can I be real
Do you really want to hurt me
Do you really want to make me cry
Precious kisses
Words that burn me
Lovers never ask you why
In my heart the fires burning
Choose my colour
Find a star
Precious people always tell me
That's a step
A step too far
Do you really want to hurt me
Do you really want to make me cry
Do you really want to hurt me
Do you really want to make me cry
Words are few
I have spoken
I could waste a thousand years
Wrapped in sorrow
Words are token
Come inside and catch my tears
You've been talking but believe me
If its true
You do not know
This boy loves without a reason
I'm prepared to let you go
If it's love you want from me
Then take it away
Everything is not what you see
It's over today
Do you really want to hurt me
Do you really want to make me cry
Do you really want to hurt me
Do you really want to make me cry
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im pretty sure listening to tina turner at 3 or 4 in a private setting didnt slow my sexual development
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Tuesday, December 1st, 2009
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oh baby aw baby, you know i was hurtin so bad
i was rollin in the street couldnt get back on muh feet
i was beat girl, so bad, there wasnt an ounce of love to be haaaaaad
i was down and out for the count you know, you know, girl
didnt even have a corner for me to curl up in, girl
i had it so bad, girl, you know a lonely lova is no way to be
i couldnt even see the light in me, ohhhhhhh the tears seemed to fall so easily
but then you came along, girl, you came on so strong girl ooooooooohhhhhhh
didnt have to ask you for nothin, woman, you pulled that barrel right my mouth, baby
before i could even look you in the eyes, girl, damn near fainted in your hands, girl
whoaaaaaaaaaaaa oaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaauhhhh
and now look what we got, wont give it a second thought, everything i sought
just when i thought the devil had bought my lot, look we we got, girl
aint shit gonna cave my world, long as you still love me, girlllllllllllllll
oh girlllllllll irlll irllll irlll ohhhh girllllllllllllll im stilllllllllllll
cryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyinnnnnnnnnnnnnnn girrrrlllllllllllllllllllll you know i love you so bad
iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii iiiii iiiiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiii iiii cant stop lovinggggggggggggggg
it's too bad it's bad it's baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaa aaaadddd
you know it's super bad and i caint stop no no nonooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooo ooooo
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Monday, November 30th, 2009
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DESIGN MY FUCKING WEDDING DRESS
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i want that stupid fat girl hand in mine and my bed to sag under that mass
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Saturday, November 28th, 2009
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"all i need is love and if i cant have that, give me drugs"
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Friday, November 27th, 2009
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sometimes it just becomes so clear how i dont relate to even people i might like to be friendly with and it makes all the rules seem so much simpler, however much more stark
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Thursday, November 26th, 2009
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and by getting my shit together, i mean get high
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Monday, November 23rd, 2009
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fucking you under time restrictions
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me living with people is such a fucking joke
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Sunday, November 22nd, 2009
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had dreams two nights in a row about some faceless small girl with shoulder length dark hair, probably in her early twenties. i feel like i know who she is in some deep distant place, but i won't place it. i struggle in some sisyphean manner to protect her and show her all the love i can in the panic, but the dark forces around us are too persistent and too many -- and i know they will torture her soon enough. she is inevitably taken from me and something like the electrified egg slicer is run through her face, like the first time i saw her get caught. love sure can be hard and the flesh is so soft.
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Saturday, November 21st, 2009
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that grey band is far wider than you'd like to admit
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Friday, November 20th, 2009
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turning your soul inside out via dick proxy
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nekron's journal